Things to Ponder (http://letslaugh.net/general/questions-you-just-cant-answer-ponder-this/)

• Why doesn’t Tarzan have a beard?
• Why do we press harder on a remote control when we know the batteries are
  flat?
• Why do banks charge a fee on ‘insufficient funds’ when they know there is
  not enough?
• Why do Kamikaze pilots wear helmets?
• Why does someone believe you when you say there are four billion stars, but
  check when you say the paint is wet?
• Whose idea was it to put an ‘S’ in the word ‘lisp’?
• What is the speed of darkness?
• Why is it that people say they ‘slept like a baby’ when babies wake up every
  two hours?
• Are there specially reserved parking spaces for ‘normal’ people at the
  Special Olympics?
• If the temperature is zero outside today and it’s going to be twice as cold
  tomorrow, how cold will it be?
• Do married people live longer than single ones or does it only seem longer?
• How is it that we put man on the moon before we figured out it would be a
  good idea to put wheels on luggage?
• Why do people pay to go up tall buildings and then put money in binoculars
  to look at things on the ground?
• Who was the first person to look at a cow and say, ‘I think I’ll squeeze
  these pink dangly things here, and drink whatever comes out?’
• Who was the first person to say, ‘See that chicken there… I’m gonna eat
  the next thing that comes outta it’s bum.’
• Why do toasters always have a setting so high that could burn the toast to a
  horrible crisp, which no decent human being would eat?
• Why is there a light in the fridge and not in the freezer?
• Why do people point to their wrist when asking for the time, but don’t point
  to their bum when they ask where the bathroom is?
• Why does your Obstetrician, Gynaecologist leave the room when you get
  undressed if they are going to look up there anyway?
• Why does Goofy stand erect while Pluto remains on all fours? They’re both
  dogs !
• If quizzes are quizzical, what are tests?
• If corn oil is made from corn, and vegetable oil is made from vegetables,
  then what is baby oil made from?
• If electricity comes from electrons, does morality come from morons?
• Why do the Alphabet song and Twinkle, Twinkle Little Star have the same
  tune?